Creative Ways to End a Relationship

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October 26, 7:45am

Well, now I’ve done it and I don’t know what the fuck to do, I’m in a damn panic.  I saw PC hide something in the linen closet last night and after he went to work today, I went to look at it.  I was naked, on my tippy-toes trying to reach in the top of the closet and he walked back in after forgetting his wallet and fucking caught me!  There I fucking was, totally nude, looking like the cat that ate the goddamn canary.  He was SO angry with me.  He reached up into the cabinet and grabbed whatever it was and shoved it in his pocket.  I think it was an engagement ring, because he said he would never want to marry someone so dishonest and he stormed out, telling me not to be there when he got home.  I’m really kind of pissed that he is overreacting so much!  I mean, you can’t be all cute and precious about proposing and then make a big display of hiding something and expect someone NOT to look!!  I’m going to call him and see if I can fix it. 

October 26, 9:30am

So he refuses to answer my calls and he sent me some ugly text messages telling me I could “go be single” and I’d never get him back and a bunch of other hurtful shit.  And honestly, with the lies and the fighting, I am kind of relieved.  So I called movers to come get my stuff out of the house; I’m having them move my furniture to a storage unit.  Thank god they were available on such short notice, and only the couch and bedroom set are mine.  I found the movers on Craigslist, though, so hopefully they don’t just steal my shit.  When they’re done, I’m going to lock my keys in the house and write a “big, red goodbye in lipstick on the wall.” Goodbye says it all!  I think it would be a perfect message to my country music singer!  Ugh, what a damn mess. 

October 26, 3:30pm

Fuck, so he called me and apologized for the way he acted.  He said he hoped I hadn’t taken him seriously about not being there when he got home and he couldn’t wait to get there and hold me.  Ummm, all my shit’s in a storage unit.  So I called Cindy, she is going to get a truck & help me get my stuff moved back.  While we were on the phone, I broke in the bedroom window to get my house keys (ripped my favorite pants, dammit).  I just hope we get everything back here before he gets home!  I don’t know why I got all dramatic over this, obviously he would be upset at me for going behind his back, but I know he would never really leave me over something like that.  So, fingers crossed I get my overreaction covered up in time!!  Thank goodness I didn’t actually write those song lyrics on the wall, ha!

 

Next week's post closes out the year with a shocking twist!

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